In memory of those who are gone too soon

*

For Lars Shygirlmike aka Shygirl - our Gummybear Princess written Fri., May 11

"I wish I could go to sleep and then wake up tomorrow and have this all be a dream, but the pain in the pieces of my broken heart and the raging storm inside my head quickly bring me back to reality, and devastatingly so. Candles light leaves a warm glow around the all too quiet house in central Ohio tonight. Wishing a swift and peaceful journey on my angel's way to get her wings at 7:15 pm tonight. To say the tears let loose a flood, would be referring to the Nile as a puddle, crocodile size tears have consumed my very being this evening. I didn't think I could bring myself to a keyboard tonight, but I'm wandering aimless at home tonight and it all seems so unreal. I needed to share, to do something, within a circle of understanding.

She graced our life with her presence, and commanded the attention of all that surrounded her. After she became toothless, she officially became the Gummybear Princess and fit the bill she did. The house is so quiet it's maddening, as this would have been the time of day she would have began yet another round of barking orders (literally) that would last a half hour or more on some occasions. Remember with me tonight, hug your hounds, light a candle, and do as I did each and every day, and as I held her in my arms for her final journey, and kiss all your hounds, and look them in the eye and repeat the following as I did to Shygirl, "I'll love you always." For me Shygirl, my sweet grey girl, my heart aches for you until we are together once again, fly free sweet angel, for "I have seen beauty but none to match your living grace". Her absence leaves me greyless for the first time in ten years..."

*A very dear friend's love, talent and eye for beauty came together to immortalize Shygirl . No one could have put as much love and tenderness into such a beautiful extension of my heart. Not a person in the entire universe could give to me what she did by putting her hand to canvas to capture my dear girl's life, love & spirit. Her sweet hands, gentle love & unending friendship will cradle Shygirl for all eternity.

A poem by Janice Comstock-Jones

My heart, it is a crystal thing, too hard to breach or break,

And I have worked to make it so

To shield myself from ache.

In times too dark to contemplate

My very soul was slashed

By things all vile and cruel and vast

That left me gored and gashed.

It's said that time will heal all wounds,

But I've seen different ways,

That healing leaves its toughened scars,

And guarded defense pays.

So slow to trust, so scarred and worn,

Yet there are those who mayslip in within my armored heart and not be turned away.

The soft of fur, the sparkling eyes

That glow with love unearned,

The silky ears that listen for the verbal love returned...
The eager face, the waggly tail express the purest thought

Without condition or restraint,

A love that can't be bought.
Not bought nor begged, but given, free,

And yet worth more than gold

The love a dog will give away

While keeping gentle hold.
He wraps it like a tangled leash

Around your mind and heart

And tugs it tight to keep you safe

When near or far apart.
He gives his true, unblemished love,

His life, his heart, his whole,

In selfless adorationof the one who shares his soul.

But, here, too, pain and loss dwell

For the little ones slip 'way,

When their dear but fragile bodies

Will not allow their stay.

Though their days are not so lengthy,

And they leave us fiercely quick,

Still they leave the tender mem'ries

Of the look, the touch, the lick,

And we carry them within us,

Even when the banshee sounds

And they guard us with the strength

Of a love that knows no bounds.

In a softer, quiet moment, Think of him,

remember whenyou walked the rocky roads together,

And always hold the love within.

For Princess Abbey written Tues., June 5

"Why can't it be good news from me for once.... It's not a good morning. After watching her at home this morning, it breaks my heart minute by minute, but I know that the Abbey we know and loved isn't there any more, and she deserves more dignity than she's able to live with right now. I was praying I would be spared having to make this ever heart wrenching decision but we both know it is what is best for her. I can't watch her go down hill any more. She's progressed much more so in this regard over the last month, and today was the day I know she was letting me know it is time. It's days and times like this that make being here at work mean nothing and feel like I'm wasting my time and myself away being here. I'm taking a vacation day tomorrow and I have my parents coming down for the day. I talked to my veterinarian early this morning and he's going to stay late for us tonight. It makes me even happier that I played hookey from work yesterday... To hit me in the gut even more, I came in this morning and my Big Lots only surviving parking lot fish was dead. I'm beginning to think that the next job I get will be as the grim reaper."

Abbey & Shygirl - Sept. 2006 - BarkPark

I Am Not There by Joyce Fossen
Do not stand at my grave and weep;
I am not there. I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow.
I am the diamond glints on snow.
I am the sunlight on ripened grain.
I am the gentle autumn's rain.
When you awaken in the morning's hush,
I am the swift uplifting rush.
Of quiet birds circled in flight,
I am the soft stars that shine at night.
Do not stand at my grave and cry;
I am not there, I did not die.